Could You Be a Woman on the Autism Spectrum?

Many women or people assigned female at birth (AFAB) only realize they might be on the autism spectrum in adulthood. For some, it’s a moment of clarity, a way to make sense of lifelong feelings of being “different,” misunderstood, or out of step with the world.

Samantha Craft, an autistic woman and parent of an autistic child, created a checklist to help women notice patterns in their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that may align with autism.

While every woman’s experience is unique, some common themes emerge:

Deep Thinking and Reflection

Many autistic women are deep thinkers. They may analyze life, existence, and their own thoughts constantly. Some are prolific writers or drawn to poetry, while others notice patterns, meanings, or details that others might overlook. Daydreaming, imagining, and mentally escaping can be ways to process overwhelming information or emotions.

Feeling Different and Misunderstood

Women on the spectrum often feel misplaced or isolated, sometimes describing themselves as “from another planet.” They may be honest and trusting, struggling to understand manipulation or deceit. These traits can make early social experiences confusing or painful.

Social Navigation and Masking

Making and maintaining friendships can feel complicated. Some women find themselves imitating peers, adopting behaviors, speech patterns, or styles to fit in. Conversations may feel exhausting, with constant mental rehearsal of what to say or how to act. Many women report feeling like they are always observing and analyzing social rules rather than naturally participating in them.

Sensory and Emotional Sensitivity

Heightened sensitivity to sounds, textures, or environments is common. Crowded spaces, noisy rooms, or certain smells can be overwhelming. Emotionally, women may experience intense highs and lows, vivid dreams, or strong empathy for others. This sensitivity can contribute to anxiety, stress, or a need for quiet, alone time to recharge.

Executive Functioning and Daily Life Challenges

Even everyday tasks, like grocery shopping, navigating new spaces, or managing multi-step activities, can feel overwhelming. They may have remarkable memory for certain details while struggling with others, notice patterns in numbers or words, and find comfort in routines, organization, or lists.

Discovering Identity and Strengths

Many women on the spectrum have remarkable strengths that often coexist with their challenges. They may be highly intelligent, thoughtful, and reflective, with a natural curiosity about ideas, patterns, and the world around them. Creativity, imagination, and a love of language or numbers often shine through, along with strong attention to detail and excellent memory for specific information. Emotional awareness, empathy, and compassion are common, allowing them to understand and connect deeply with others. These abilities, combined with perseverance and unique problem-solving skills, can be powerful assets in both personal and professional life.

If You Think You Could Be a Woman on the Autism Spectrum

Learning that you may be on the autism spectrum can bring relief, validation, and self-understanding. It can help explain past struggles and highlight personal strengths. At the same time, it is important to acknowledge the challenges: many people still do not understand autism, discrimination and misunderstanding are common, and workplaces and social environments are often structured in ways that create additional stress or hardship for autistic individuals. If many of these experiences resonate with you, it may be worth exploring further with a knowledgeable clinician who can provide support, guidance, and resources for navigating the unique experiences and difficulties of life on the spectrum.

Understanding and embracing neurodiversity in women can create a path toward greater self-compassion, meaningful connections, and a life that honors your unique way of being. So if you think you could be or know a woman on the autism spectrum and would like to access the complete checklist by Samantha Craft, check out my free resources page.

About the author:

Sarah Rossmiller, LPC is a psychotherapist providing online therapy services for adults in Texas and Minnesota. You can learn more about her and her practice at Rebellious Wellness Therapy. Her profile is also featured on Psychology Today and Good Therapy.