top of page
  • Sarah Rossmiller LPC

Navigating Grief After Cutting Off a Family Member

Opting to cease communication with a parent or another significant family member as an adult is a deeply difficult decision, often accompanied by profound feelings of loss and grief. In this post, we will explore the emotional journey of mourning following this choice and offer guidance on navigating the complexities of this process.


The Grieving Process...

Mourning the loss of a parent or family member in your life is a complex and emotional journey. It's crucial to acknowledge the depth of this loss and allow yourself the space to grieve. This decision is akin to experiencing a significant loss, and it's vital to recognize it as such.

As you navigate this challenging path, you'll find that your emotions may resemble a rollercoaster. You might experience sadness, anger, guilt, or even confusion. These emotions are entirely normal and should be acknowledged without judgment. Give yourself permission to feel them.

Seeking Support...

Just as with any other type of grief, it's essential to reach out for support. This can come in the form of friends who provide a listening ear or support groups where you can share your experiences with those who understand. A therapist can also be a valuable resource, offering a safe space for you to express your emotions and receive validation for your choices.

Navigating the "What-Ifs"...

It's common to question your decision and wonder about "what if" scenarios. You may find yourself pondering if there was anything more you could have done to salvage the relationship. These thoughts are a natural part of the grieving process, but it's important not to dwell on them excessively. Allow these thoughts to come and go, acknowledging them without letting them consume you.


Throughout this journey, it's crucial to practice self-compassion. Understand that you made this decision for your own well-being and emotional health. Remind yourself that it's okay to put yourself first and prioritize your own needs and happiness.

Honoring Positive Memories...

While the decision to cut off contact may be necessary for your well-being, it doesn't erase the positive memories and experiences you had with your parent or family member. These moments are a part of your personal history, and you can still honor and cherish them. They don't have to be forgotten; they can be integrated into your life story.

Moving Forward...

Grieving the loss of a parent-child or other family relationship doesn't mean you're stuck in the past. It's about finding a way to move forward and create a life that aligns with your values and emotional needs. This process is about healing, growing, and ultimately finding a path that allows you to live a life that resonates with your true self.


In conclusion, the decision to cut off contact with a parent or family member is a difficult one, and the grief that follows is a natural and necessary part of the journey. Healing takes time, and it's essential to seek support, practice self-compassion, and allow yourself to grieve in your own unique way. By navigating this complex process, you can find a path to healing and emotional growth that will enable you to move forward with your life.


bottom of page